Learn to hide your “ew, gross” reactions when they tell you all the stuff you never wanted to know about your bodily functions. Support them when they come home after each test, upset because they failed—and gently remind them after they get their well above passing grade how unnecessary the “I’m going to fail out of medical school and never become an MD” dramatics are. Date them for long enough, and you’ll become one too. There will be weeks you'll forget you even have a boyfriend—friends will ask how he is and you'll say, “What? And when you witness others perform these same acts that, before you began dating your med student, you spent your entire life doing too, you'll wince and wonder, “Ew! Don't they know how many germs and bacteria they're spreading??! Romantic date = Chinese take-out in front of the TV on their 10 minute study break. A vacation together consists of a trip down the street to Walgreens for new highlighters and printer paper. Their study habits will make you feel like a complete slacker. The name of the 8 billion-lettered, German sounding cell that lives in the depths of your inner ear, the technical term for the “no one's ever heard of this disease” disease that exists only on one foot of the Southern tip of the African continent. Some will be extremely rare, others will be more mundane. They will be certain they have it (no second opinions necessary.) Med school can, and will, turn even the sanest into a hypochondriac. Believe me, it's going to get bad...you'll watch yourself transform into the anal retentive person you swore you'd never become.Since becoming a doctor, his sleep and comfort have become much more important.He used to only use the extra bedroom if he had a test the following day or if he was post call.Sometimes we trade babysitting with other couples and just go running together on a Saturday morning.We never go to movies together - we need time to actually talk, reconnect, and have eye contact (oh so rare with four kids around).
My husband still expects a weekly date; he even admits that HE is the one who "needs" a date night every weekend.
But, sometimes it feels like even our common goals are intangible and quite distant.
One thing that we decided to do before we started medical school was become involved together in a hobby. It immediately became a ton of fun for us and continues to be an exciting part of our relationship together.
This attitude eliminates a lot of issues stemming from unmet expectations and disappointment.
DATE NIGHT Time and communication are essential for a strong, medical marriage. Even during our pre-med years, we went out on a date together every single weekend.